April 22, 2009 — Santa Monica, CA. Rush Limbaugh, American’s #1 conservative radio host, is no stranger to having enemies or being embroiled in controversy. The talk show host has endured attacks for decades, but some say his run may be coming to an end, not over his criticism of a wildly popular President, but over a fierce new battle with the rock band Rush.
The Canadian trio, know for hits “Tom Sawyer” and “YYZ,” is demanding Limbaugh either change his first name or no longer go by ‘Rush’ on the radio. “He’s killing our mojo and ruining our career,” said Geddy Lee, Rush’s bassist, singer and frontman. “People think we’re a conservative rock band. We’re not right-wingers. We’re from Canada. Our cops ride horses, we have a Prime Minister and a Queen, and much of the country speaks French.”
Not surprisingly, the band’s request has been met with defiance by Limbaugh. “Typical, long-haired, Canadian liberals,” said the voice of the Republican party. “Of course they don’t like me, I bet they’re playing private shows for Al Qaeda. They can go to Hell. And when someone asks if you heard Rush on the radio, they’re talking about me, not that crap band that hasn’t had a hit since the ’80s.”
The battle of words has even spread to fan clubs for both parties, as rockers are protesting outside Limbaugh’s radio show, and conservatives are returning the favor at Rush concerts. Signs displaying “Rush is Right,” “Go Back to Canada,” and “Crush Rush” we’re being waived by supporters. There have been no reports of violence at the demonstrations, but authorities are braced for an escalation. “It’s a powder keg; this thing could blow any minute,” said a local Police Chief.
The reporters at Thank God For the Internet will continue monitoring this story and provide updates when news breaks, but we’ve gotta ask. Who ya got? Rush or Rush?